Saturday, September 10, 2011

I had forgotten

It's 10:29pm and I just returned from the grocery store. Late-night grocery store runs usually make me grumpy. I need, NEED an hour minimum after kids go to bed to do something totally unrelated to my role as a mother or wife. Sometimes it's reading, sometimes it's creating, sometimes it's wasting time in front of the computer. Whatever it is, it's MINE. A grocery store trip does not fit the bill.

But an earlier planned trip to the grocery was postponed in favor of a child's football game, a run, a shower, a bathroom cleaning, a floor mopping, a baptism, an alma mater's football game, etc. etc. followed by pouring rain and hail and a monsoon that flooded the back porch and pelted the windows and kept me home. By the time the kids were in bed (a very late 9:15) and I swept and cleaned the floor again thanks to H's spilt milk and cracker-eating spree, I was Grouchy and Ticked.

Then I walked out the door and felt 75 degrees. Do you know what 75 degrees feels like? I had forgotten. In the desert in September, you forget what pleasant feels like. You only know squelching hot and frigid air conditioning. You don't remember ever walking out of your house to a temperature that's actually cooler than your house. It catches you off guard.

At least it did me. I stood there, in the 75-degree breeze, and let it blow away the Grouchy and the Ticked. I thought about the time and energy I had wasted today--a lot of it--on Grouchy and Ticked. I have been prone to extra grouchiness lately and I think one reason why I haven't been able to snap out of it as well is because it's been so long since I've been able to go outside for any prolonged period of time and actually enjoy it. When I'm in my house for so long, I think I tend to forget that there's more world beyond my world. My world becomes small and my thoughts become small. I had forgotten that 75 exists. I had forgotten that there is more beyond the spilt milk and the mashed crackers on my newly mopped floor. Tonight I am grateful for the late night trip that helped me remember.


Tara said...


Madsen Family said...

That makes me laugh b/c I have been feeling much the same way this pregnancy with all this dang HUMIDITY. And I am too fat and lazy and sweating all the time to excercise so I've been missing those endorphins. But the other day there was a hint of fall in the air and Will and I went for a walk (he rode his bike) and it made me feel like singing! So, I can relate. I'm so happy for your 75 degrees and hope they're around to stay (as well as my humid-free days. I cannot deal with any more humidity. Or rain).

mwells said...

Catherine, you are just around the corner... and I miss you. You are amazing!